Jen Continues a Holiday Tradition

I guess pretty much every family has some sort of Christmas traditions they do with each other every year. Whether it’s taking a family photo in front of the tree or always opening one gift the night before Christmas, most families have a familiar routine they know to expect every December, and we Davises are no different. We always go to Nana’s on Christmas Eve, then open family gifts from Santa at my parents’ house on Christmas morning, then over to Granny’s during Christmas day. That’s our ‘tradition’. But our best tradition (and by best, I mean cheesiest) is our choice of holiday music.

Do we listen to the Burle Ives Christmas album or the Disney Characters Sing Christmas? Oh, no. Better. We listen to Alabama Christmas.

For as far back as I can remember, we’d listen to the Alabama Christmas album no less than 100 times from the day we took the Christmas decorations down from the attic until Christmas day. I’m pretty positive it came from one of those music clubs that were so big in the 90s – you know, send in $0.01 (and $7.99 for shipping) and get 20 cds from this list of crappy cds. Of all things… the Alabama Christmas album. And we actually lost the first one for a few years, and then one day a couple of years back Mom or Dad came home from Half Price Books with a grin – “Look what I found.” And it was like not a day had passed. We all still knew the words to every song, from Thistlehair the Christmas Bear (spreading the good news everywhere…) to Christmas in Dixie to Santa Claus (I Still Believe In You).
Now it’s clear that Thistlehair is about the cheesiest song ever possible, but it was always our favorite, I guess because kids like bears. There’s even kids singing on the track (wait until you get to minute about 3:15, it’s pretty much awesome).

Do we live in ‘Dixie’? I doubt it. I’m pretty sure ‘Dixie’ refers to Tennessee (although then why would a band called Alabama sing about it…? Come to think of it, there’s also a song on the album called Tender Tennessee Christmas. That’s just confusing.). But we loved this album, and now it’s a part of all of us. It wouldn’t be Christmas morning without Mom putting on these time-honored tunes and Ty and me singing them out-of-key to try to get on Carly’s nerves. (Hint: it always works).

So here I am, sitting at my desk in Korea, scourging Youtube for videos of Alabama singing Christmas tunes. It’s not quite the same, but it does bring me a little reminder of home and of my wonderful family… dorky though we may be.

Jen Rides A Trolley Up a Mountain

We spent a Saturday at Taejongdae Park on the island of Yeongdo. Gorgeous weather, lovely scenery, and fantastic friends... it's hard to imagine life getting much better. And I even had swine flu that week.

People in this slideshow: Jen, Sarah, Marcus, West Virginia (AKA Joe), Paul, Cameron, Angelique, Jessica, and random Korean people. And a trolley.

Jen is Thankful

So... this is my first Thanksgiving away from home. Such. A. Bummer. And that’s really and understatement. Everybody knows that Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday of the year, simply because it’s the best. Obviously. It has the best food, there’s very little stress associated with it since mostly all I have to do is drive home and eat a lot for 2 days with people I like, and I usually get to spend every evening of Thanksgiving week with my friends, not worrying about work the next day. There is very little to be desired.

Well, one good thing about having H1N1 this year means I can continue my streak of not working on Thanksgiving Day. Thumbs up to that. (Sidenote: I am totally fine; the infamous Swine Flu barely even bothered me, I just mostly felt really tired... so I slept for 4 days straight, and was out of work the whole week. It was actually sort of awesome.)

The true best thing about Thanksgiving, I think, is that it’s a celebration of being grateful. And I believe that being grateful is the most important feeling someone can convey, to those they love, to humanity, and to the Universe. Every day should be about giving thanks, actually, so I am devoting today’s post to the things I am thankful for.

I am thankful for...
My beloved family, who I cherish and feel so blessed by every day, even on the other side of the Earth.
Hi-speed internet.
Starbucks Awake black tea with loads of sugar.
My kindred spirits on different continents.
The invention of leggings.
Being from Texas.
Having Val, the best audience ever, to always listen to me and love me.
HBO series.
Skype.
Having the best Mom ever, who always listens and never judges.
Growing up in a crowded house full of laughter.
Nana’s and Granny’s unmatchable home-cooking.
Scarves.
Living so close to one of my favorite people in Busan, Sarah Cheng.
The Universe for being so generous to me.
Having a Dad who would do anything for me, and who taught me what good tunes were, changing my life forever.
Q-tips.
Chipotle (even though I haven’t had any in months).
Having someone convince me that I do deserve good things to happen to me.
Colorful earrings.
The 2002 album 'Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots' by The Flaming Lips
Somehow meeting the two funniest girls in Mesquite way back when we were all merely teenagers, and becoming friends forever.
Having the friendliest, happiest, sweetest brother anybody could ask for.
My husky voice - it’s always a conversation starter.
High heels.
Somehow being brave enough to move away, knowing it would be the best thing for me in the end, no matter how hard it was at the time.
Cheap, beautiful false eyelashes in Korea.
Having a clever, beautiful little mini-me named Carly to remind me what life used to be like, and to have her to be SO overwhelmingly proud of.
Learning to be really good at silver chopsticks.
Being taught to love reading at a young age - my life would never be the same otherwise.
French fries.

Oh, there are so many more, but these are just the few I could come up with right off the bat. I love Thanksgiving so much, and I really am sad I can’t be with my family, but you gotta grow, right? And I give thanks every day anyway, just to be safe.

I love you, family and friends in Texas! Kisses from Korea!

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow

All the foreign teachers here in Busan were so excited about the 'snow' that could be seen on the ground and on the mountaintops today. My first thought was, okay, maybe it's because I'm from Texas and I'm not a snow expert, but I'm pretty sure that this isn't the mystical substance we call 'snow'.

Not to rain on anyone's parade. Or snow on it. But in fact, I'm pretty sure that being from Texas makes me even more qualified to identify this cold white substance as a tiny bit of ice and frost that would disappear once the first light of day hits it. I know this because we try to call this 'snow' back in Texas too, in a sad attempt to fulfill our unlikely dreams of a white Christmas. This is the type of stuff where you could scrape up your entire front yard and make a snowman the size of a roll of toilet paper. Which we would do, happily, and taking many pictures along the way.

And this does not mean I'm in for my very first white Christmas - what it really means is that it's colder than a well-digger's shovel and I don't have a car to huddle in on the way to school. And it seems even colder because it's 0 degrees outside because of the whole Celcius thing. Brrr. Is it spring yet?

Jen Finds a Photo Op... or 100

Here's some photos of me having fun with my friends. I haven't been as avid as I would like, but I'll try to make up for that.

Top 5 Things I Didn't Think Were Possible Before Korea

Hey, never say never, right?

1. Accidentally showing my class of middle school boys a video of a woman breast-feeding.

While many people would think this was impossible no matter where you live, they'd be wrong. In fact, if you're unlucky enough, and you have the entire internet at your disposal, there's almost nothing you can't accidentally show your class.

What happened was: I had the video all loaded and paused, and the completely innocuous advertisement before the video had already completed when the computer froze.  So then I had to pull the whole thing back up again, and what was the advertisement before it this time?  Something involving a close-up of a baby nursing. Awesome. 

I don't even know what the ad was for.  Were they trying to sell breast-milk?  I don't know.  But this is Korea, so maybe.

2. Becoming a millionaire overnight.

Yeah, so it's in Korean Won and the exchange rate to the dollar is about 1,000: 1, but it still counts.

3. Getting asked out by a cage fighter on Halloween.

I have to specify that it was a real cage fighter, not just a Halloween cage fighter.  And I also have to specify that he was not merely a cage fighter, he is also a teacher and a really intelligent and interesting guy.  But when I tell the story, clearly I'm going to say 'cage fighter' because of obvious comedic reasons.  

By the way, yes, we did go on a coffee date, and yes, it was really nice.  He's the smartest cage fighter I know.

4. Talking about the meaning of "Business up front, party out back" with a straight face.

Some might think that learning what a mullet is isn't pertinent information for a 14-year-old Korean kid.  I respectfully disagree. 

I made a lesson on hairstyles for my extra class, and not only did we cover the origin of the mullet, we covered the faux-hawk, the beehive, and the flat top (à la Kid of the 1990's hip-hop duo Kid n' Play).   

Hey, I'm sure these kids really need to know "Waiter, I dropped my fork" and "Don't I know you from somewhere?"  But they also need to know what to call that ugly hairstyle they saw on the hillbilly on the bus.

5. Having fish eat my dead skin.  And paying almost two whole dollars for it.

I can't say I anticipated that this would happen to me in my lifetime, but it is a really great experience (once you get over the tickling).  I'm pretty sure Dr. Fish is a colleague of Dr. Scholl's, although I have to say, the former offers a much more niche service.  They're both good guys though.

Holy, Moley, Me-Oh-My

This is my new favorite song, given to me by the coolest of the cool, my new friend West Virginia (and yes, that makes me Texas). I've been listening to it on repeat because it's just so wonderful. It made my day then and every day since that day. I dare you not to be happy listening to this song, I double-dog dare you.

Thanks WV for being so killer.

Jen Films a Clip for Daddy-O

Here is a clip I filmed on my camera of the gang at Moe's, this really cool little dive bar with thousands of vinyls along the walls, located near Pusan National University. It was my first time there, and I loved that atmosphere. Dad, if you ever visit me here, this is one of the first places we'll go. I love you!



People in the video, from left to right: Marcus, Matt, Charles, Alana, Sarah, Hannah, and yours truly.

Jen Falls in Love

I’m really starting to love it here, I have to say. I told myself I didn’t have any choice but to like Korea, so I would go in with only a good attitude, but you can’t convince yourself to love something just because you’ve decided to only focus on the good things. And I really am loving it. The food is magnificent, I truly can’t say enough about it. The massive quantities of homemade street food, the various side dishes that come with every meal, the prevalence of delicious soups, the restaurants with grills in the middle of the table for all the different meats – it’s heavenly. And cheap. And the weather is gorgeous – they weren’t lying when they said that their autumn is the best season. Technically I haven’t been here to experience any other seasons, but this weather is perfect. Crisp and cool in the morning and the evening, and sunny and mild during the days. These are the types of days everyone revels over for about 1 week in the spring back home in Texas, but which always too quickly give way to the stifling heat of Texas summer. And it’s been this way for the entire 6 weeks I’ve lived here (can it only have been 6 weeks?). I dare say it’s actually gotten warmer these past couple of weeks even.

Some people questioned why I would leave such a ‘good’ job back home to cross the globe and make a fraction of what I was making before. You know, that depends on your definition of ‘good’. If it means I made a lot of money, then yes, I suppose it was a ‘good’ job. But if it means I do something day in and day out that I enjoy, that isn’t just a waste of 8 hours until I can leave for the day, only to return the next day to do the same meaningless work over again, then the answer is no, that job wasn’t a ‘good’ job for me. I spent too many days back then working for the weekend, too many workdays just watching the clock until I could go home with one more day under my belt so that after 5 days I could spend a mere 2 doing whatever I really wanted. I had to break that cycle.

I recently stated that I am involved in a passionate love affair with Life. And that is so much the truth. What does that mean? Does it mean that every day is sublimely happy, and that it’s never hard, and that nothing ever gets me down? No, of course not. Love affairs are seldom perfect, but they are always exhilarating and keep you guessing, keep you interested – if it were mundane, I wouldn’t be calling it an affair. More like a slow death sentence. Because I just can’t be on autopilot here. Everything is too new and too special for that, and it matters too much to me. And yeah, sometimes it would be nice; sometimes I’m exhausted and I don’t want to try, and it would be great to be able to just zone out - to put on my sweats and lay on the couch all day, as it were. But the trade-off is still WAY worth it, and you just keep pushing until the next day comes along, until Life whispers that next sweet nothing in your ear that reminds you why you fell in love with it in the first place.

Here there are no wasted days. Every day counts. Everything matters. I’m awake, and alive, even though it’s hard sometimes. Now, the difference is, it’s hard but I’m awake. Before, it was like I was sleepwalking and there was nothing that could wake me up, and when it was hard, what reason did I have to soldier on? Now, the worst day is still a day on another continent, in another life. It’s a different mindset, one I couldn’t have achieved in my old life because there are some things you just can’t know until you know.

And now, I know.

Jen Loves/Misses Her Family

Dear Family,

Thanks for the lovely card you sent me. Nobody has a family that can hold a candle to you - I know, because I devised a ranking system and you always win. It made my day to hear from you and especially to get the heartfelt message from Cleo (a paint-stamp of her paw print). I really appreciate the thought, although I bet it was Mom's idea, not yours Cleo. To show you my love, I wrote you this poem.

My Family Is Better Than Your Family
by Jen

Embarking on a journey with a sparkle in my eye
I packed a bag, said my farewells, as I prepared to fly.
I kissed my loved ones on the cheeks and said, I'll see you soon.
But mainly concentrated on the new phase of my moon.

I left to seek adventure, and to "change my life" and such.
But what I never realized is I'd miss them all so much.
I'm grateful for my family, and though we live apart,
No matter where I lay my head, home always has my heart.

I love you! I'm the luckiest girl in Korea. :)



I also got my new rice cooker from my school, and 2 books from Amazon today. What a wonderful Thursday. :)

Jen Wakes Up Disappointed

I had a dream last night that I walked past Oprah on the street and she stopped me and complimented me on my cowboy boots. I was sure she would make them one of her Favorite Things. And then I woke up. Bummer.

Humans are Wowed by Explosions

I got a bunch of videos of the fireworks on my digital camera, and yes, I realize that I could just as easily find some clip of fireworks on the internet, but this video is authentic. So to make it special, and because I'm a geek, I edited a bunch of the videos together using iMovie on my laptop, and for a first try at video editing I think it's pretty darn good. Of course, Maxine did most of the work, but still. I was there.

In this video: fireworks birds, my raspy voice, Celine Dion and Andrea Boccelli, my new, lovely friends from the UK Nichola and Clare, explosions.

Jen Watches Fireworks and Compares English and the Korean Language

Here's a special video I did specifically for Mom since she asked to hear my voice more often (oh, Mom, in all your years did you think you'd ever make such a request?). A bunch of us went to Gwangalli Beach on Saturday to watch the 5th Annual Busan Fireworks Festival. We had to get there early because there would eventually be over 1 million people on the beach (and all the beaches I've seen here are relatively small crescents of land, not long coastlines like in Barcelona, as you can see in the video)

Notice that Hannah calls me what sounds like "Jenna", but really it's a joke because one of the differences between the Korean language and English is that their words are basically not allowed to end without a vowel sound. That's why there are joke tee shirts around that say "I'm a Englishee Teacher", and why my principal will ask me if I've had 'lunchee' yet. It's just one of those nuances that makes the Korean language of Hangul different from English, and what makes teaching language interesting. But it also makes it hard for native Koreans to go from one consonant sound to another (example: sub-u-way and ice-u-cream) without inserting a vowel sound.

Incidentally, someone asked me why we Westerners butcher the Korean language, and I said I thought it was funny because I could ask the same thing about my students and English. The answer is simple - there are sounds in Korean that we just don't have in English, so after a lifetime of never having pronounced these sounds, it's really hard to learn now that I am set in my ways of speaking. And vice versa. For example, a commonly known mistake when Asians speak English is pronouncing R sounds like L's. That's because an R sound is pretty hard to pronounce if you have never had to do it before, and you may not think an L sounds like an R, but the way your mouth is shaped when you do it is pretty similar. Another thing I hear a lot is pronouncing F like P. As in "Jenny-Per", which I hear in the hallways constantly. There is no F sound in Hangul, but I find that this mispronunciation is less common in adults, and I think the reason is that it's much easier to correct because you can easier show what you're doing with your mouth. "Put your top teeth on your bottom lip and say F-F-F." I tell them. If you're going to call me by my first name, at least you're going to pronounce it correctly!

Or when the tables are turned, there are some sounds that English doesn't have (think the rolling R's in Spanish). There is a sound in Hangul that is closest to a combo of Z and J (which maybe sounds crazy but try it), and for some reason the only example of for this is when Moms say Target like Tarzjay. And by Moms, I mean my mom. And me - who am I kidding?

Another example that is really prevalent in Hangul is the a G sound that's sort of like a K sound, but softer than both. The softness is really hard for me to grasp since American English specifically is so harsh and guttural. So I butcher the language, but practice makes perfect, and I've only been here a month. At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Jen Eats the Proverbial Crow

Since the dawn of time, our household has been making fun of Dad for being a softie. And I have obviously been at the forefront of this movement, as with most of the family taunting that goes on. I get the ball rolling, at least. That’s my job; I’m the one who won’t let you get away with anything. Val’s job is to be the sweetest little bleeding heart liberal and to laugh at our (my) jokes (thus avoiding almost any teasing, as it may happen), Ty’s job is to play music loudly, eat all the food, and get away with stuff Mom never would have let us do, and Carly’s job used to be to be the cutest baby sister ever, although she has taken over as family smart aleck in my absence. I think she may even be better at it than I am, but if I ever get zinged I just pull rank – I will never let her forget I’ve got 12 years on her. As for Mom, her job is to clean obsessively, take up for us all (but for Ty way more), and be the world’s best listener, and Dad’s job is to take us to the best shows, be the family ATM, and to tell long stories (slowly). Oh and also, to be the uber-sentimental one.

It all began when we were watching Disney’s Beauty and the Beast at the old, old house on Round Rock (which used to just be the old house, but it has been demoted since the family moved to Forney). It was the early 90s and we were all elementary school aged or younger (and Carly wasn’t even around yet). This was what I like to think of as the heyday of Disney films. They really had us in their clutches back then. The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, The Lion King – man, things were looking good for Michael Eisner and co. They couldn’t go wrong. We were buying what they were selling, that’s for sure.

The charm of Disney films was that even adults could enjoy them. It wasn’t like watching Barney with your child, where the incessantly stupid songs would get stuck in your head and you would slowly lose your will to live. Disney films were smart. Clever dialogue, heart-wrenching plots, real life themes, and humor that would go over a child’s head were deliberately inserted into Disney films by these genius writers to make the movies even more marketable. Hence, even our dear old Dad was watching B & the B with us and enjoying it too.

If you don’t remember how the movie ends, or somehow haven’t seen it, this is what happens (spoiler alert!). The Beast is turned human again at the very last second by falling in love and in turn winning the love of Belle, his prisoner, the usual beautiful Disney heroine. There’s a lot of hoopla and it’s got all the magical happy ending music and everything works out perfectly for Belle and the Beast (whatever his real name is). It’s touching, really. But I still remember looking up and seeing Dad’s face (and forehead) turning red and his eyes welling up with tears. At such a young age, crying out of joy was an unknown concept to me, so all I could say was, “Dad! Why are you crying?! It’s not even SAD.”

And so began a lifetime of taunting Dad for being sentimental – threatening not to have him walk me down the aisle at my (totally theoretical) wedding because I don’t want any blubbering, asking if he can handle it when we watch It’s a Wonderful Life. Because my heart has always been made of stone. I don’t cry at sad movies or Extreme Home Makeover or mesothelioma commercials where a man who has been blind for 40 years regains his sight. Because I’m hard.

Until now. Ugh. For the first 26 years of my life, those things were true. I prided myself on never shedding a tear. I was as cold as ice. But now, my ice-cold heart has melted, and I feel like I’m making up for lost time or something.

This manifested itself most recently this morning in my early class, when we were watching Disney film clips and putting mixed up song lyrics in order. The first song we did was “Circle of Life” from The Lion King. I had given the kids the lyrics all cut up and their job was to put them in order while the clip played, and whichever team got them in order first, won. I love activities like this, and so do the kids, so I’m just sitting there, patting myself on the back when I hear the opening strains of the song and the first words of the African chant the animals sing before the English words come on.

“Nants ingonyama!
Bagithi Baba!”

What a great song!, I think. What a wonderful movie, what a moving scene, it’s so amazing seeing all the animals and the sunrise, and the majestic King Mufasa with the baby Simba… – wait a minute! Then, lo and behold, I feel tears prick my eyes.

I didn’t outright cry or anything. I was able to get it together, but still, are you kidding me?! It’s 8:15 in the morning, and I’m moved to (almost) tears by a movie I have known since I was a child?! It’s like being potty-trained for your whole life and then suddenly having an accident. I can’t count on my sentimentality any more! Now not crying is like a skill I have to practice. This sucks. I usually like having feelings and stuff, but this has gone too far. Please, heart, don’t embarrass me, and in front of my students no less!

I would have kicked myself if I didn’t also find it hilarious.

So I have an apology to make, to both of my parents actually. To Dad, sorry about all those times I made fun of you for crying. But I bet stories like these make it up to you way better than this apology will. And Mom, sorry I laughed at you for putting “Circle of Life” on Nana and Granddaddy’s 50th Anniversary slideshow. Turns out it really is a sweet, sentimental song. I realized that the hard way.

And now you can both mock me for a change.



And here is a scene from the ABC show Modern Family that I think is hilarious. I'm so doing this when I adopt my Korean baby:

Dr. Fish - So it's not just a clever name

Anyone close to me knows it has long been my dream to have my flesh eaten by live animals. Well, now I can check that one off the list.

Yesterday, 4 friends and I went to a place called Dr. Fish to soak our feet in water teeming with little minnow-like fish who eat the dead skin off people’s feet. I was expecting a nail salon, but it was more like a very cute coffee shop which just so happened to house flesh-eating fish. It only cost 2,000 won (less than $2), although technically we were feeding their pets, so I thought they should let us come for free. But whatever, I let it go. It was glorious – a little ticklish right at first, but you got used to it.

Below is a video that I filmed while we were there. I apologize for turning the camera on its side, I wasn’t thinking straight, possibly because I was filled with glee at the thought of clean fresh feet. Meet my friends Marcus, Sarah, Hannah, and Mike. Mysteriously, the fishies liked Marcus’s feet the best for some reason, those little gluttons.

Video View of Cho Jang Middle School

I took this the first week of class and forgot about it. It's brief, but I think it better shows the view from the front steps of my 'work'. Happy Friday!

P.S. For all those concerned about Maxine, she was unharmed. And the internet was not working when I got home yesterday, so I guess that's par for the course.

The Great Internet Debacle of 2009

Today when I woke up, I was certain the sky was bluer, the streets smelled better, and I could hear "I'm Walking on Sunshine" playing happily in my head. You see, today was the day I was getting internet installed in my apartment.

I had lived without it for 2 weeks, but somehow I'd made due. Sometimes I would randomly get a weak connection from within my apartment, but it was always hit or miss. I felt like the travelers on the Oregon Trail must have felt, never knowing what each day would bring. Would I find a signal today? Or would I have to make the treacherous journey down to the coffee shop on the corner, risking smallpox and dysentery, or possibly breaking the heel of my shoe, the modern day equivalent of a broken wagon wheel? And what's worse, I had to cope with the agony of wondering, would the coffee shop even be open? Would I be able to find a seat near a power outlet? The questions plagued me daily, and the uncertainty haunted my dreams.

So today was the big day. I would finally be able to fulfill my dreams of whiling away the hours on Facebook, watching Family Guy, listening to The Ticket, and reading The Onion, as god intended it.

You can imagine my surprise and distress when my co-teacher received a call from Internet Installer Guy this morning asking if my computer was in my apartment. I answered yes, trepidaciously, because why would he want to know that? I was immediately filled with what I imagine mother's protection instinct to be like.

I don't have any pets, and my laptop is the closest thing to one.* Yes, of course she has a name, it's Maxine. What would I call her if she didn't have a name? Laptop? You wouldn't expect me to call my offspring Kid, would you? That would be absurd. Unless I was Kidd Kraddick's mom, I guess, but I still maintain that the name is pretty ridiculous.

So for whatever reason, Internet Installer Guy was trying to get onto Internet Explorer on Maxine, and he couldn't because Maxine is a Mac (hence the name) and Macs don't have Internet Explorer, they have Safari. Apparently there are not very many Macs here in Korea, so he didn't know what Safari was. After a lot of confusing conversation between Mrs. Kim and me and then back to Internet Installer Guy, he eventually left my place. Mrs. Kim said I should bring my laptop to school the next day and have the computer teacher figure out what I needed to do.

This distressed me for numerous reasons. First, I didn't understand why he needed to even touch Maxine to install a modem in my apartment. I had always been under the impression that you just need to flip a switch or something and then my place would be wired for internet, and all I would have to do is plug in. Second, it was especially frustrating because it was a test day here at school, so I wasn’t doing anything other than being held hostage in the teachers’ lounge anyway, looking up stuff on the internet. Thirdly, trying to explain the existence of numerous types of web browsers to my computer illiterate co-teacher with my limited computer knowledge + the language barrier was like a comedy of errors. (She even asked me if I had ever even gotten on the internet with my computer - I guess since I didn't have Internet Explorer she thought that might have been an impossibility - and I was like, PLEASE, of course I have.) Except it stopped being funny when I realized that lastly, I wasn't getting internet on my big day.

Disappointment consumed me, but I was down, but not out. I had lost a limb, but I was still trekking along with the Willamette Valley in my sights, determined not to let a little thing like typhoid dissuade me. After I had explained the concept of the Safari compass and where it was located on the screen, I had heard Mrs. Kim mumble something about 'drivers' and I thought, there is no way in hell I am letting this man touch Maxine's drivers. He didn't even know how to get to the internet on my computer - what kind of mother do they think I am? I wouldn't let a veterinarian operate on my son, and I wasn't going to let this guy touch the drivers on my Mac. Luckily another of my co-teachers offered to call Internet Installer Guy back after this first failed attempt and told him that if he could just install the modem, I could figure the rest out.

So that's where I stand. Haven't been home yet, don't know what I will find there. At this point I will consider myself lucky if Maxine is unharmed, but I am hoping against hope that I will have made it to my goal destination. If not, I'll have to spend another few days trying to catch that weak signal, or as I like to think of it, using flint and stone to make fire somewhere out on a lonely western prairie.

*Not including my favorite purse, Fluffy, and my iPhone, Penny.

Home, Sweet Ho

I finally got somebody to tell me what my address here in Busan is, in English. I am fairly sure that if anyone sends me something using the English address, it will make it to me. As you can see, in Korea the addresses are written in opposite order of the way they are written in the US, with the biggest area first (city), then going down to neighborhood, building, then finally apartment number. Honestly, since I was a (very nerdy) child, I have always thought that is the way it should be, so it makes perfect sense to me this way. Well, at least when it's written in English.

So here it is:

South Korea, Busan, Seo-gu
Bumin-dong 3ga 34-3
Mungak Building, 410 ho
602-842


부 산 광 역 시 서 구
부 인 둥 3가 34-3 문 각 원 룽 401
최 욱 환 (주 인) 귀 하
602-842

The funny thing is, back home in the States, putting your address up on your blog would be completely unsafe and unheard of, but I defy even one person who lives in Korea to find me using this thing. It's like a scavenger hunt, even for lifelong residents of this town, because buildings are often unmarked and the street addresses don't always go in numerical order. This makes me think that the postmen are really ninjas with superhuman brain power. Or just total masochists.

NANTA Jams in Seoul

Here is a video I found online of the Korean cooking/ percussion/ comedy show NANTA, one of the best and funniest shows I have ever seen.

Ouch, My Seoul Hurts

Seriously, that's the last Seoul joke. I couldn't help it.

Here is the account of the rest of our time in Seoul. We had one day of presentations about various things we as EPIK (English Program in Korea) teachers would need to know, such as the opening ceremony where a traditional Korean performance team played drums (which seemed a little loud in light of the previous day's activities), a lecture on Korean history and Culture by multilingual language teacher and Korean native Hyunwoo Sun, and another lecture on Culture Shock and EPIK Life by a former EPIK teacher, Eddie Young. All of these were really great - super interesting and engaging - which came as a little bit of a pleasant surprise.

What came as a not-so-pleasant surprise was how some of my fellow countrymen behaved in these presentations and towards the presenters. First, a little background about Korea. In the Korean culture and language, politeness is extremely important. There are even two different sets of words for if the speaker is desiring to show great respect to the listener, versus being more comfortable with the person they are speaking to, and thus not necessitating such a high level of politeness. One way this politeness manifests itself is that the Koreans really won't tell you not to do something, even if that thing is against the rules. For example, when we were at the art museum I could tell they didn't want us to take pictures, but they wouldn't tell us not to because that would be rude (I just took photos with the flash off, since I believe this is the reason photography is prohibited). Another example is how after 2 nights of dozens of EPIK teachers drinking beers in and around our dorm building, they finally announced in our class that we were not allowed to have alcohol on campus, even though the security guard had been right there the entire time. I think he just would have considered it rude to ask people not to, even though it was the rules and he was clearly within his rights to say something. And I think people were drinking because they thought they could, or else he would have said something.

So of course, to every yin there is a yang. Americans are apparently the yang in this scenario. I think probably most other foreigners have an inherently less polite culture than Korea, if only because
politeness is SO VERY important here. I understand that. But still,
there comes a point when it's not just "Korea being polite", it's
Americans being impolite. Being the so-called Ugly Americans I dread
having to call my fellow citizens.

I was literally amazed at some of the things I heard people say and do
during the presentations. Yelling out, demanding air conditioning.
Clapping loudly when the presentation had run a little long so the
presenter would end. Yelling out "You know what would be really
helpful?..." to a man who knows 7 languages at the age of 27 and who
was currently teaching us Korean. Yeah, there's a chance on Earth
that HE doesn't know what would be really helpful, but you do. Sure.
Rudely asking why we aren't getting paid for this mandatory weekend in Seoul, never mind that we missed 3 days of work and got a free trip to
have a blast in Seoul which included sightseeing and a performance by NANTA, which was amazing. Who do these entitled, demanding, rude
people think they are?! And since when does Korea owe them
something? And what makes them think they know everything?

Of course, when I would hear this extreme rudeness, was it in a
British accent? Was it in that beautiful, lilting South African
accent that I adore? Did it include the word 'aboot' and end with the
word 'ey'? No. It was in an easily recognizable, ugly American
drawl. Lovely. I personally went up and apologized to each presenter
that I felt had been visited on by an Ugly American. It was the very
least I could do, and I hope it showed that we are not all mannerless.

I really hope Koreans don't base their opinions of America on just
these negative experiences. We wonder why we hear stories about other
countries hating us, and surprise, surprise, maybe they even have a
valid reason. After this, I don't even like us very much.

Seoul Searching

One of my favorite things about Korea is all the opportunities for puns.  Maybe that seems silly, but I need a little humor in my life (believe it or not) and when we went to Seoul last weekend, there were about a million soul/Seoul jokes flying around.  We're just lucky that we live in Busan so the Seoul jokes are still funny.  And punny.

So, Angela, Chris, Eric and I headed to Seoul on the KTX (the bullet train) on Friday morning bright and early.  We were all excited about the trip because we would be off work Friday-Tuesday, and I was even more excited because trains are my favorite way to travel.  When I was riding, I wished I could call my little brother circa 1991 and rub it in his face.  Man he used to love trains, but did he ever get to ride one?  And across the magical faraway land of Korea, no less?  I think not.  It would have been even better if I had remembered to wear my Osh Kosh Begosh blue-and-white striped overalls.

Anyway, we got to Seoul in about 3 hours, and I was doing that thing where I revel at the fact that I have never stood in this exact spot on Earth ever before.  I think I was annoying my friends, but that's what I like to do when I go new places.  It doesn't get old.  We rode the Seoul subway to the school where we were staying and checked into our rooms, where I met my roommate Jami.  Luckiest roommate pairing ever!  Jami is from Canada, and we all know I love Canadians -  after all, my beautiful favorite friend in Barcelona, Holly, is from Vancouver.  By this point, it's about 12:45 and we don't have anything going on until dinner time, and then after that we just have the opening ceremony in the morning, so we are free to explore the city.

So instead of doing that, we just take the group of about 12 of us who are there by that point and go looking for a place to grab a beer.  As I'm sure I said many times that day, there are few things better than day-drinking.  The reasons are countless, but included in them are the fact that if you're drinking during the day, you're definitely not at work, and it means you're ready to have fun.  Basically, you are 100% guaranteed a good time, and this day was no exception.  Plus we were with new, cool friends, in a new city on the other side of the globe.  What's not to like?  

The little nuances of different countries are fun to discover (most of the time), and what seemed like an unfortunate one at the time was that bars don't open until night, like around 6pm.  But when the Universe closes a door, it opens a window.  This time, the window was the fact that while unlike at home, bars are not open at 11am, also unlike at home, you can drink in public.  So we just went to the Family Mart and got some 1600ml beers and hung out in this random alleyway, getting to know each other.  

I met Jake and Tori, also Canadians (that seems to be the biggest foreign contingent here in Korea because apparently it's pretty hard to get a job in Canada, at least in teaching), and very fun kids.  I also met Chaz and Kate, Iowanonians (that may not be the correct expression), who are so super fun and who live near Angela and Chris here in Busan.  Then there was of course the roommate Jami, then Ashlea and Hope, our next-door neighbors in the dorm.  And we were just the early-comers, there were dozens of more people to meet, but these were the people we spent our first few hours in the Seoul with.  It was a great start to a fantastic trip,  and I'll not forget the afternoon spent in a random alleyway in Korea with some of my new Seoul mates.  :)

First Week Photos

Enjoy!

Compare/Contrast Busan and Dallas

Hey, I am an English teacher, right? So I’m kicking it old school with a compare/contrast post.

Things they have in Busan and in Dallas:

7 Eleven, McDonald’s (cheap, too - in Barcelona a Big Mac meal was the equivalent of $10, and although here it looks expensive because it’s 3500 Won, that’s really like 3 bucks), KFC, Burger King, Friday’s, Bennigan’s, (well, actually I guess they don’t have Bennigan’s in Dallas any more... maybe if they served spaghetti like they do here, they’d still be in business), Outback (but it’s actually not out back here either, it’s upstairs)*, Krispy Kreme, Dunkin Donuts (at least it’s correctly named here, unlike in Spain where it’s called Dunkin Coffee), Starbuck’s (you think it’s expensive in Dallas? Try twice as much here), Cold Stone Creamery, Baskin Robbins (apparently love of ice cream is universal), bad Asian drivers (but somehow it works when everyone’s doing it), waffles, every bad crime show on CBS, 2-year old episodes of MTV and Bravo shows, false eyelashes (and they’re less than $1 a pair, score!!!), baseball (8 teams that play over 100 games a year - AGAINST EACH OTHER - and the Korean obsession with it is something I understand less than the European obsession with soccer)**, strawberry Chap Stick (a million times better than cherry, I don’t care what Katy Perry says), Kenny Rogers music, and plastic surgery (apparently 75% of Korean women have had epicanthic fold surgery on their eyes).

Things they have in Busan that they don’t have in Dallas:

3 million Koreans, PC Bangs (pronounced like ‘bongs’ - internet gaming houses on every corner because gaming is huge here), tons and tons of street vendors selling mostly unidentifiable food that smells delicious (reminiscent of the State Fair, but not costing a million tickets), kimchi (which is delicious, and not at all scary - think non-mayonnaise-y, spicy cole slaw), silver plates, cups, and chopsticks, decorative wall stickers (which are actually really cute), Soju (Soju:Busan as sweet tea:Texas - that is, if sweet tea got you drunk), ham-flavored potato chips and Cheetos (I guess only America is missing out on this phenomenon because they had them in Europe too), McDonald’s Bacon Tomato Burger and corn salad (um, why are they holding out on Americans?), dead fish on display pretty much everywhere you look, umbrellas used as parasols (due to the extreme Korean fear of dark skin), beaches, the subway (which, as subway systems go, Busan’s is really nice and easy to navigate), and of course Angela, Chris, Eric, and Jen.

Things they have in Dallas that they don’t have in Busan:

Chipotle (why, oh, why can’t every place on Earth be as obsessed with Chipotle as I am???), guacamole (but don’t worry, I’m spreading the word), my loved ones (but that’s not exactly a surprise, because duh), deodorant (I guess Koreans just don’t have B.O.), sales tax, forks, fat people (the biggest Korean person I’ve seen is the size of my left calf), gay people (is it because Koreans all choose to be straight? No, it’s because of this)***, any kind of illegal drugs (Korea has a zero-tolerance policy), Daylight Savings, lawns, ethnic majorities/minorities (seriously, Korea only has one race - Koreans), trash cans outdoors (it is literally a scavenger hunt to find a place to throw things away), the ampersand, the letter R.

Things they don’t seem to have either here or at home:

Falafels, Don Simon sangria, nude beaches, hostels, and my Barcelona friends. Sad, but true.


So it turns out it’s not so different here than it is there, and honestly, identifying the little differences is one of my favorite things about life abroad. It’s like a game of quirks that I can’t lose.

*Disclaimer: This joke is just one more step in the direction of ultimately becoming my mother.
**It’s not that I don’t like soccer or baseball, I just don’t understand how having only one big sport doesn’t get boring.
***If it’s not clear that I’m kidding here, you must not know me. But welcome to my blog.

Jen Entertains Herself

Today was my first day as a teacher - ever. It was a little rough, seeing as how Korean kids are allowed to behave about a thousand times rowdier than American kids, and they can’t understand me when I threaten their loud, rambunctious behinds. Also, even if I could learn every kid in the school’s name by the first week (that’s right, in Korean schools, every kid in 3 grades goes to my English class once a week), turns out they all sound the same when you’re quickest pneumonic device is to think, okay, remember that that one’s name sounds Asian. I had the same problem in Barcelona with the metro stops... okay, remember it sounds Spanish-y and has an ‘a’ near the end... not the most reliable way to figure out how to get places.

In order to combat my own ignorance (because turns out they write their own names using Korean letters, not phonetically in English - who knew?), and because I thought it would be fun for them, I decided to let them choose English names to be called in my class. I’d just make a seating chart and let them fill it in with their new names, ones I was good at pronouncing. Brilliant! Being my first day and all, and not knowing how many English names the average 15-year-old Korean kid knows, I decided make a list of common male names they could choose from if they couldn’t come up with one on their own.

So I started listing all the names I could come up with, and believe it or not, after like 7, I started having trouble. How is that possible? So then I started thinking of groups of people who I could list, like biblical people, movie and TV characters, Cowboys players and ooh, Ticket personalities, presidents, and every male in my family. It got pretty fun at that point.

I didn't fully realize how funny it would actually be until at the end of my first class I look down and see what the kids have chosen. Oh, I see here that Bob and Dan sit next to each other, that makes sense. I wonder if they know that that funny bald kid over there, Donovan, is supposed to be their sidekick? And that we are going to have to play Gay or Not Gay every time they are in class (even though in Korea the answer will always be Not Gay). I also notice that I have students named Linguini (neither a name, nor technically English since I’m pretty sure it’s Italian, but guess whose name I'll never forget?), I Love You (but you don’t even know me), and Sexy Man (total misnomer because he is neither).

Wouldn’t it be great if they somehow just knew who their namesakes were? This is how I imagine class going:

How was everyone’s weekend? What’s that Bill? You and Ted had an excellent adventure? Cool, but I hope you are able to keep your bogus journeys to a minimum.

Gordon, you are always disrupting class, of course, but your Bart Simpson impression is dead on. And please stop bothering George, no matter how much it makes Junior laugh.

Felix, your face says you’re 70, and Patrick, stop staring at me with those giant eyes. Tony, you look like you’d be a heartbreaker... if this wasn’t an all-boys school. Also, quit throwing things because the other kids will just pluck that balled up paper right out of the air.

Wayne, Garth, both of you need haircuts. Try using this Suck-Cut. And after that I need coffee and cruellers, stat.

Matt, Mark, Luke, and John thanks for being so well-disciplined.

I’m doing great, Joey, now go sit down, and Chandler, pay attention and quit trying to make the other kids laugh.

Hey, if I can’t speak the language, at least I've come up with some way to entertain myself.

Hilarious Witty First Blog Title

So a lot of people have asked me the question, “South Korea, huh?”

Yeah, I get it, it’s not really on the top of most of my peoples’ must-see lists, and especially not as a place to actually reside. And no, it doesn’t sound as glamorous as Barcelona sounded. But you know, glamour isn’t what it’s all about for me. I guess maybe I should have known that, but if I start counting the things I should have known, this blog is going to become really depressing, really fast. Maybe it should be titled Live and Learn.

I guess I should start with why I left Barcelona in the first place because that feeds into why I came to Korea. There were a lot of factors, not the least of which being homesickness, but practically, living in Barcelona wasn’t sustainable for me. The job market was tough, and I felt that when I did find a job I would have to work much harder than I wanted to work on my ‘lifelong vacation’ in order to pay the bills. I sold myself on the idea of coming home and teaching math somewhere, and beginning a practice as a personal finance coach. It seemed so appealing at the time, plus it was just nice to have a plan. And by that point, I was also coming home to a boy, but I have to be clear - I was not coming home FOR a boy, just TO him. I know how it might have looked, but please, give me some credit. If I’m bold enough to move across the planet, hopefully it would follow that I’m also not dumb enough to move back across the planet for a guy who it already did not work out with once.

Needless to say that lasted about 4 minutes, and being home wasn’t nearly the charmed life I had built it up to be while I was looking forward to it back in Spain. I was living back at home with my parents, which I loved because I got to spend so much time with my baby sister Carly, and I became besties with Carly’s cat, Cleo. Plus, it was free. But it was harder than I had anticipated to go back to life in Dallas and to be broke. I’ve recently realized that material things don’t matter to me (hence I sold everything I owned and moved off), but after years of indulging in that Dallas lifestyle, where what kind of car I drove was ‘important’, it was going to be mighty humbling to live very frugal life, and move back in with my parents in Forney, TX, while I got my life back in gear. Especially while getting my life back in gear entailed finding a job so I could afford to get an apartment and fill it up with new versions of all the crap I had sold merely 3 months before.

It was literally easier just to up and leave again. And thank goodness for that because what really makes me happy, what really is the only thing I know doesn’t get old for me, is new places, new people, new sites. That I learned while I was in Europe. So even though Barcelona didn’t ‘work out’ for me, it still did serve a purpose. And just because I left doesn’t mean it wasn’t a life-changing experience.

So where did I get the idea for Korea? Well, one of my Barcelona friends, Christina, was coming to work here in Korea after Barcelona. She already had a job before we even got to Spain. And it is a really sweet deal: free flight, free housing, public transportation so no car payment, no car insurance, and you get paid around $2,000 a month, tax-free for the first two years. So basically all that money is bank. No other place on the planet will give you that good a deal (I know because I’ve looked), and teachers here are very highly esteemed, put on a pedestal as they should be everywhere else. But at the time when she first told me about it, none of this phased me. I had never considered Asia as place for me, and I even remember at one point saying the words, “There is no way in hell I would go to Korea.” Live and learn, right?

Then, when my BFF Angela was visiting me in Barcelona, I told her about Christina and her plan. Angela’s interest was immediately piqued, and she started researching it and was sold from the start. Her boyfriend Chris and her brother Eric were on board in no time, so when I decided I had to get back out of Dallas, Korea was the natural choice. Having 4 friends here made Korea appealing in a way that going it alone could not have been, no matter how brave I was, and the job/apartment setup could not be beat. Plus, another of Angela’s friends, Greg (who we know from high school), had just completed his first year and loved it. As it turns out, everyone I talk to either knows someone or has a friend who has taught in Korea - it’s pretty common, surprisingly. My Uncle David also lived here for 4 years in the 80s and loved it so much it seemed he may have never come back.

Fast forward 3 weeks, and here I am! Greg recommended his recruiting firm, Footprints Recruiting (www.footprintsrecruiting.com), and they helped me find a job (even though they basically dropped the ball on about 100 things along the way, but more about that later). All I needed was my college degree, no experience necessary, and it didn’t even matter that my degree wasn’t in English.

I will teach at Chojang Middle School, an all-boys school here in Busan city. The schools here are much nicer than the ones back home, with great amenities for English classes because apparently learning English has become a high priority for Koreans in the past few years. Luckily for me. My school is nestled on the side of a mountain, overlooking the bay and the city sprawling out below. The view is truly breath-taking, and I will post pictures as soon as I have some.

I honestly have so much more to say, but this has become more like a short story than a blog post, so I’ll save it. I thought that maybe it’s because I can’t speak a word of Hangul (the language they speak in Korea) that I have so much to say here on my blog, but who am I kidding? I’ve always had a lot to say. Some things don’t change no matter where you are on the globe.